the rug out from under

school's out in about a week. no teachable days left. well, let's revise that - no textbook teaching days left. in fact, i have to do my stupid f*cking textbook inventory tuesday - shoulda started sooner but i really wanted to get through the civil war.

report cards, i should go pick them up from the school or just go in tomorrow.

it's pretty much over. i'm going to cry on friday the second "pomp and circumstance" kicks in ... and let me bitch about "pomp and circumstance" since bitching is what i do best. (when i consider this offense, i vascillate between "that's petty" and "stupid b*tch!" but fellow ex-student teachers, tell me what YOU think.)

it was MY job to direct the graduation songs - as in, sit center, direct them to rise, give them hand signals during the songs, and signal them to sit. this may seem minor but 1) MY kid is introducing the song in her speech, 2) I have been working with the kids on volume, expression, crescendoes, etc. ... 3) this "decision" to switch jobs (minor as it MAY seem) was made in my absence. so i get back from a workshop to find that my C. has decided that SHE should direct and i should sit in the fucking corner with the CD/cassette player. are you inputting that? she gets to sit front and center and run the fucking show while i press play and stop and have a lovely view of the kids' left ears. the kids I have worked with all year.

she wanted to come back and help out with graduation, lovely. good on her, whatever. but it is written into the script that SHE would do the music and I would direct the songs and that really seems more fitting than the way it turned out. for one thing, she doesn't know the kids anymore, not that she ever did for sure. when she wants results, she criticizes their singing. i get results by letting them know i LOVE their singing and need to hear it better. when she wants them to smile, she criticizes their faces. i get results by smiling at them. DUH. and as you have probably figured out, there's no way around or out of this short of telling my C that i want my fucking job back. (side note: i know why this happened. two reasons - 1) she once fucked up a graduation ceremony by playing the wrong tape and got teased by the emcee till she found the right one and 2) she misses the attention. there.

minor, right? hopefully on the day of, i will see it that way. right now i feel icky about all manner of things and so am taking this pretty personally. just when i think i'm rid of her. JUST WHEN.

ugh.